You either ARE this person, or you KNOW this person. Someone who can’t help serving up a pun or playing with words in every conversation. Someone who hears a joke and HAS to repeat it. The person who laughs at their own lame jokes and who’s compelled to be funny all the time – or at least THINKS they are funny most of the time.

AFE salutes you, oh Dad Jokesters. And we’re here to help.

If you find your comments are falling flat, if you have to explain your jokes, you may be suffering from malhilarism. There are no pills or ointments for this ailment. All you need is a mental readjustment and a trip to the comedy doc to sharpen your funny bone. Luckily, AFE Brings the Laughs and the know-how on Dad Jokes and other annoyingly fun conditions. 

We’re CELEBRATING Dad Jokes with a Dad Joke contest. Moron that later. Hahaha.

What is a Dad Joke?

You don’t need to be a dad, or even a guy, to tell a Dad Joke. They’re generally question-and-answer jokes with obvious and predictable punchlines. Jokes like “Why did the chef avoid eating sushi? Because it was a little fishy.” They’re jokes that make people groan. Wordplay that cries foul. Puns that roll around in your head and make you whine. They’re named “Dad Jokes” because they’re clean-cut enough to tell to children, and corny enough for just about anyone of any age to understand. If you ever need to amuse a kid, bring out a few Dad Jokes and you’re good to go.

Why was six afraid of seven?

Because seven eight nine. 

Parenting is a universally relatable human condition, so it makes for great Dad Jokes. Not only do parents get the humor, they can pass the jokes on to their own unsuspecting kids. Parenting jokes are especially effective in stressful moments when the family needs a break. It’s OK to share parent-to-kid conversations, especially if they’re funny. And even better if they’re in an everyday situation, like this bathroom humor: Mom: I see you have a musical instrument in your hand. Daughter: Huh? Mom: You’re holding a tuba toothpaste.

What’s so funny?

By definition, something funny is an idea inconsistent with the next idea to follow. It’s an unexpected take on a well-known situation. It is groan-worthy banter. It’s actually anything someone else might find amusing. It’s the deadpan face, showing no expression, delivering a line designed to prompt peals of laughter. Funny is hard to define and has spurred generations of comics from stand-ups to film stars. Funny is not an exact science, and never will be.

My dentist only has one appointment time.

Tooth-hurty.

How to recover from a fall

Not a planned pratfall, of course. Those are ALWAYS funny. We’re talking about a fall from reliability. When time after time your jokes crash and burn or, worse yet, are ignored. It’s tough. But the tough keep going. Learn from it.

• Has the topic grown stale? Pick a new topic or two. Look around and find something else to comment on.
• Take a hard look at your sense of humor. Maybe it’s a little too dark or cruel, and that ship has sailed among your friends. Tone it down, step back, assess. Maybe it’s too basic. Bone up on current events and spice up your jokes with some intellect. Just don’t go too highbrow.
• Is your timing off? Maybe you confused some words, took too long to set up the joke or land the punchline. Practice in front of a mirror and deliver yourself from future pain.
• Getting no response at all, just crickets and eye rolls? Maybe your jokes are so old that everyone has heard them a thousand times. Remove them from your mental list or, better yet, come up with a twist on them. Change up the questions. Switch out the answers.
• Are you only getting little giggles and never big guffaws? Prime the pump. Laugh big and loud after you deliver your punchline and people will feel compelled to laugh with you. OK, maybe AT you. But at least they’re laughing.

When does a joke become a Dad Joke?

When it becomes apparent.

Keepin’ it real seasonal

There’s always a holiday on the horizon. Except for August, which is long and slow with no holidays and few natural opportunities for jokes. Except this one: Is it really August or are Julying to me? Anyway … turn to the calendar and see what holidays are on the horizon and home in on them. We’ve scared up a few Halloween gags to get you started.

• Why did the ghost put starch in his sheets? To scare everybody stiff.
• Why did the ghost go to the bar? For the boos.
• How do vampires travel on Halloween? On blood vessels.
• What do you call two witches who share an apartment? Broommates.
• What’s on a mummy’s playlist? Wrap.

Applaud the Groaners

Join us in raising Dad Jokes to a higher level of respect with the AFE Brings the Laughs Dad Jokes contest. Submit a video of you telling your best/worst jokes. Or send us a DM with your joke. We’ll sit through them all and select the top jokesters. Then we’ll post our own video – of a professional comedian delivering the finest Dad Jokes submitted – and blurting out the names of the winners.

Submit your best Dad Jokes to AFE Brings the Laughs by 16 Nov 2021.

And just one more for good measure: Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Hey, do you know how to drive this thing?”